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| Image borrowed from www.pickywallpapers.com |
Christmas after Christmas I pulled through with a smile on my face, always hiding my tears and sadness for the sake of others ... hoping that each passing holiday was the last that I remained childless. I remember last year was especially grueling - it marked our 10th Christmas without a child, despite our efforts. It marked our first Christmas of no longer TTC - one where we were anticipating the upcoming home study process and holding out hope that a placement was in the cards for us.
And now, one year later, here I sit (coffee in hand!), watching my 9.5 month old little miracle flip through picture books, kiss pictures of her Daddy in a baby-proof photo album I made for her and dancing to the music on the radio. It doesn't get any better than this!
Is it everything I hoped for? Does it take away the darkness that I was feeling all those years? Without a doubt - the answer is a loud and resounding YES. Moonbeam lights up our home, our hearts, our lives. Being a mom is more than I ever could have hoped for - I love it. People say parenting is hard ... Apollo and I have yet to feel this. We feel that parenting is joyous and fun. Infertility is hard. Navigating adoption relationships is hard. But being a mom and dad? It is the best thing that has ever happened to us. After 10 years of battling infertility, we are happy to say that parenting is the easy part.
This holiday season is a special one for our family - our first Christmas with little Moonbeam. It is so much fun to see the season through Moonbeam's eyes - she is smitten with the tree, the lights, the hanging decorations and the Christmas pictures and cards sent by family and friends. She loves the little elf hat we got her and the boxes, paper and ribbons (so cliche but true - she really does love the wrapping and boxes better than the actual gifts!). She loves the Charlie Brown Christmas cartoon, the Elvis carols playing on the radio and the stockings hanging from our fireplace mantel. She brings magic to our home this Christmas. She makes our family feel whole.
With that - time for another coffee and to go kiss my little elf. Wishing you all the best this holiday season! Merry Christmas!
Listening to: Presents for Christmas - Solomon Burke
Thanks for posting on my blog and for your thoughts. Its nice to hear what others think of the topic of what the term parent means. Wishing you and your family a Merry Christmas!
ReplyDeleteWishing your family a Merry Christmas and congrats on your miracle!
ReplyDeleteVisiting from iclw.
hi from iclw
ReplyDeleteit is so wonderful to read about so much joy
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas! These little ones sure are a miracle. I cheers your mug from down here in WA state (with hot cocoa) and send big hugs. BTW - if you wanted to e-mail me pics of Moonbeam...I would be so happy! E-mail is on my page!
ReplyDeleteAlissa
Glad you had a wonderful and complete Christmas and that you were able to put the hard years behind you and enjoy your little Moonbeam to the fullest!
ReplyDeleteThis is a beautiful post. It brings me hope to hear that the infertility is the hard part.
ReplyDeleteHi from ICLW! Thanks for stopping by my blog! Congrats on your little blessing. I agree completely- infertility was the hardest thing I ever went through, being a mommy is a piece of cake compared to that! Looking forward to following your blog!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you're happy this Christmas and moonbeam is everything you've hoped for. I love reading about you living in our "happily ever after". It makes my heart happy, friend.
ReplyDelete